“The number one criteria for advancement and promotion for professional is their ability to communicate and connect effectively.”
Harvard Business Review
The Number 1 human need is to be loved and to love.
The Number 2 human need is security.
The Number 3 human need is to feel valued.
Wise and exemplary leaders know the remarkable value of connecting emotionally with their people.
We humans have this interesting need: a core-deep need to feel special.
Let’s come back to Debbie. I told her as part of her turn-around coaching that as a leader it is critical to connect emotionally with your team. It is a best practice that all leaders should work to master. Without building that attitude you will receive mechanical responses and attitudes, you will have work without passion.
When you communicate through words and actions that you authentically value them, you build teams that conquer mountains and work with heart and soul.
To do this, look for ways to “catch” people doing the extraordinary. Point out when they bring that extra and shine a spotlight on it. This will make their face and self-image shine! Make them out to be the hero of the moment!
At least once a month during a team meeting put a team member in the “spotlight.” Speak their praise and shower credit on their performance.
Critical Statistic: 78% of people who change jobs are leaving their previous manager!
Debbie, a point leader who has strong emotional intelligence see his/her primary role is to get the right players in the right positions and doing the right things. This way each of the team members will be able to succeed.
Make sure you ask each of your team members:
1. What do you enjoy doing?
2. What do you feel you excel at?
Let them know your primary goal is to get them in their “strength zone” where they can get in the flow and flourish. That will communicate to them their value in your eyes and that you understand who they are and what skills they can bring. It may seem simple, but the better they feel about themselves, the better they will perform professionally. They will create stunning work and feel important. They will have a voice and a role to play.
Debbie, I have three grown children. Each possesses unique gifts and talents. Their personalities are quite different. They have each chosen different career paths. When I am with them, it is all about them. I am asking questions about their world, not focusing on my own. I am expressing pleasure and interest in how they are each doing. I am, dare I say it, working at connecting and making them feel special in the moment. My son recently wrote in his father’s day card, “dad, thank you for your strong interest in me.” Wow, the power of those emotional connections. You gain trust, you receive loyalty, and you receive love.
If we can focus more of our time and efforts on making people feel valued, worthy and significant, we will go from a good team to a superb team who loves their leader.
Next week is our final week in Emotional Intelligence Boot Camp, your leadership standards of excellence!