Contact SteveEmail: Steve@stevegutzler.com
Purchase Steve’s E-book Here:
$49/month for Cell Service!
Topics2morrowknight 2013 behavior bob burg Boot camp brilliance business carly simon coming soon compassion2one contagious emotions courage determination donald van de mark doubling effectiveness dreams dr epstein e-book EI emotional hijacking emotional intelligence emotional intelligence for personal leadership emotional management emotions exceptional you fear fresh start goals goal setting health honor code if i get to five imagine lead leader leadereship quest leader in the spotlight leaders leadership leadership quest leadershipquest leaders in the spotlight leading mood network networking planning play big Playing big power questions rebuild rebuilding relationships relaxation relaxing seattle self-awareness self-improvement self management self respect social media speaking steve's favorites stevegutzler steve gutzler steves favorites survivor the go giver the good among the great the stuff that dreams are made of training two minute drill vision what matters most
Category Archives: Emotional Intelligence
Bringing Out Your Brilliance
I’ve been a part of dozens of corporate and business events and retreats. After a while they kind of blur together. It is the same hotel conference rooms. The same curiously similar buffet tables. Always the ridiculously poor lighting at the podium. But the people, they are who make it special. Yes the people!
Recently I was presenting at a corporate leadership retreat on Emotional Intelligence for Extraordinary Leadership. It was a really great morning of dynamic interaction. The CEO of the organization was truly exceptional; he had stunning leadership execution. But honestly, he captivates you with his people skills. His smile, his wit, and his unique ability to involve each person. You feel yourself elevating in thought and conversation just by being in his presence. Plus, my personal favorite, he had a contagious laugh that you just couldn’t get enough of.
The Defining Moment of the Retreat
On the second day of our retreat (the CEO actually called them “Advances” because his company never retreats) the CEO came up to the front to address everyone in the room. The previous morning I had described an example of a company where they take time each month to place a team member in the “Hot Seat.” When the team member is sitting in the Hot Seat, everyone goes around the room and talks about how that person contributes, shines, makes a difference and works hard to put skin on their goals as a company. It is a “your special. Thank you” Moment.
Sometimes when I share that story I can almost feel people rolling their eyes, sometimes I even see them. Tough minded types don’t like warm and fuzzy moments. Business and leadership is not for the weak of heart. It is a jungle out there and if you can’t step up and perform then you will find yourself in the junk yard!
So here was this CEO in front of his team. He stood and addressed the room stating that he would like to do the Hot Seat activity, but with a little twist. Then he walked around the room, stopping at each person. He literally placed his hand on each team member’s shoulder and talked about the stunning success contributions that each person had made. I kept thinking, “Where are his cheat sheets?” But he didn’t have any. I watched in wonder as the faces of each person lit up at his words. Each person looked newly inspired. I was witnessing the power of communicating personal value. Its transforming power, just those two or three minutes of recognition healed, emboldened, and filled hearts with a renewed courage to continue on!
Emotional Intelligence 401 in action! What a leader. What a magical moment.
And then the Surprise!
If that moment wasn’t enough, he turned to me. Yes, little ol’ me, in the corner taking it all in. He actually said, and I won’t forget the words, “And now I left the best at the end, Steve Gutzler.”
As he walked toward me, my heart started pounding. My eyes moistened. When he placed his hand on my shoulder and spoke glowingly, I melted. I faked a cool demeanor and a soft smile. But inside, I was a puddle. I have those words recorded in my mind. I return to them often because in my world, as I am sure it is in yours, I have many small voices. Sometimes even my own voice is speaking small to me.
But on that day I found myself driving to live up to those words of greatness. Emotional Intelligence can mean a lot of things to a lot of people. For me it is something you experience and I attempt to deliver to one person at a time. One conversation, one smile, one handshake, one leadership moment at a time. I guess that is one reason at the end of my posts I say “You matter to me!”
Tying my best to be emotionally intelligent,
“Leaders understand emotions drive behaviors, performance, and greatness!”
You matter to me!
You know that good old movie, Christmas Vacation with Chevy Chase? I love that scene at the beginning when he takes his family out into the forest to cut down a tree. He brings it home, unclips it, and it springs out fifteen feet and nearly injures everyone. Talk about over the top… well, that’s what I’m like at Christmas too, a real life Chevy Chase.
I love Christmas! The whole thing! I’m one of those simple hearts who is not in conflict over enjoying both the magic of Santa Claus and still remembering the importance of the real meaning of Christmas… the birth of the Savior Christ in Bethlehem.
When our kids were little, I so desperately wanted to make their Christmas full of magic and wonder. One year, when my daughter was three, I actually climbed up onto the roof while my wife, Julie, was bathing her in the tub. I had the perfect plan! It was the night before Christmas, and all through the house, baby Jenna was bathing, her jammies laid out. Dad on the rooftop wearing golf cleats making his way to the chimney… Don’t worry this isn’t another story of me falling…
My plan was fun, child-like, Santa-like even. I wanted to jump around on the roof like Rudolf the Red-nosed Reindeer and pretend to have made a noisy landing. I wanted to yell down the chimney “Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas Little Jenna!” I just knew this memory would bring joy and magical memories and warm her little heart and soul. She’ll be putting on her PJ’s and say “Listen, Mommy, Santa is on the roof! And I think Rudolf too! Yippee! I am so excited for Christmas! I love you Mommy. I love you Daddy!”
Well, just like in Christmas Vacation, my Chevy Chase plan didn’t go quite right. Instead of being all gumdrops and fairytales, it was more like a horror film where a crazy guy comes down the chimney… My enthusiasm got the better of me and I jumped too hard and scared my little Jenna half to death. And Julie too! Then when I started yelling down the chimney, Julie reports that Jenna looked like a cat tossed into water, she scratched and clawed out of the bathtub nearly climbing to the ceiling. She was terrified of what was happening, unable to understand what was really going on.
Julie is convinced that I permanently altered her psychological wiring around Christmas. Our little Jenna, now grown up with a baby of her own, has never liked Santa Claus…hmmm wonder why… She is actually very well adjusted, turns out after that incident it is me that needs the counseling! I felt terrible about the mishap.
So instead of leaping down chimneys this year, I want to ask you to take a little leap of faith with me now while I reflect on the real meaning of Christmas.
Imagine: Silent Night, Holy Night
The first one! Before Santa Claus, before Christmas trees, before lights, or malls, or bad holiday shopping traffic. A scared 16-17 year old virgin betrothed to be married to Joseph is shown an Angel who says “Fear not, favored one. I bring you good news. You will give birth to the Christ Child… you will call him Immanuel-God with us!”
When the birth came, there was no fanfare, no elation or supporting medical team. Just a handful of dusty shepherds, some livestock and a star overheard to point the way. God will always use something to lead us in the right direction towards Him.
In that little stable over 2,000 years ago, Christ cried and the world rejoiced.
That little baby wrapped in swaddling clothes was God’s gift to mankind. The survivor. Christ Jesus. He had one mission: to die upon the cross for our sins. My sins. Steve Gutzler’s sins. And there are plenty there. The Bible says He rose again and is alive in Heaven. I can receive the gift of Christmas, as can you.
Don’t we all need that gift of hope and love? I know that I sure do. My world can become turbulent, confusing, and very messy and hard at times. I need that promise of a plan more than ever.
So this Christmas, I am going to stay off the rooftops. I am going to go to church, a candle light service. I am going to light a candle. And I am going to remind myself of that baby, that man, that Savior who died for me so that I can live in his Amazing love.
I want to take a moment to thank you for connecting with me. What a privilege it has been. I appreciate all of my readers. It is an honor to know and serve you the best I can, even if we have never met in person. Merry Christmas to you and I am sending much love to you as well.
It is going to be a great 2012! But first, celebrate your Silent and Holy Night.
Play Big Inner Circle Starting in 2012! Sign up will begin in January.
Includes a Weekly Coaching Video Series and Monthly “Call In” with questions and answers.
What’s the cost? Only $27.00 per month. This elite coaching program will include spectacular content to help each of us experience our best year!
10% of profits will go to charities including Compassion2one. Thank you!